Things We Miss About Baseball

SI has a great idea for an article, but the execution is lacking.

Ones I agree with:

6. Listening to Baseball on the Radio (recently I read that Malcom Gladwell really enjoyed reading about baseball in the boxscores when he grew up in Canada - they didn't have games there and it got me thinking about how much I like to talk shit and write about the evils of Kobe Bryant). This all got me thinking about how reading and listening to baseball actually enhances rather than distracts from the experience and next year, I will probably subscribe to MLB's internet baseball radio.

9. Wimpy Middle Infielders. The article likes wimpy middle infielders because "As youngsters, most of us always knew we’d never be tall enough for the NBA or hulking enough for the NFL. But baseball, there was a sport that regular-sized people could play, and therein lied much of its appeal." And while this ought to apply to me, as a slightly undersized former baseball player, this isn't why I like small middle infielders. I knew even when I was 9 years old I'd never play pro baseball. I did not dream about these kind of things. I liked the fact that teams made CHOICES. They sacrificed hitting for fielding. Now, with a guy like Jeter playing short, they think
they can get everything. I miss a guy like Ozzie Smith who occasionally batted .300 but hit like 5 homers a year, but made just insanely crazy defensive plays out there.

18. The Eephus Pitch.

"Pitcher Orlando Hernandez broke it out once a couple years ago, but when Alex Rodriguez teed off on it, the pitch was a memory again almost before A-Rod’s homer came out of orbit. Before Hernandez, there was a plethora of eephus experimenters, from LaRoche’s La Lob to Bill Lee’s spaceball to Steve Hamilton’s Folly Floater. The origins of the pitch can be traced –- on an arc, of course –- back to Rip Sewell of the Pirates, who floated his way to the 1946 All-Star Game on the strength of his invention. He then surrendered a memorable home run to Ted Williams off an eephus pitch and was never heard from again."

Wow. I didn't know Hernandez tried it on Arod. Good for him. The Eephus reminds me of a kid we used to play against in little league named Ethan. He was the worst starting pitcher in the league and everyone called him Eephus. I miss that a lot.