The Kids Are All Right, aka Lesbians Are Also Hopelessly Neurotic and Self Hating Just Like Other Limousine Liberals

This film was good for what it is. But I don't like what it is. The scene that really did it in was Annette Bening flipping out in the restaurant. The exchange in the bar -

"You helped me set up the business so you could feel good about yourself."

"No, I helped you set up the business so you could feel good about yourself."

Ugh. I don't think there is a more perfect way to summarize the hopeless neuroticism of coastal dwelling uber-liberals and their needlessly anxious, xanax popping, pinot noir sipping, truffle oil flavoring, wheat grass drinking yuppie lifestyles.

Good God, how wrong they have it. You help the people you love because you believe in them and/or you believe in the concept. Why would anyone want help setting up business to "feel good." What fuck kind of soft-ass people have we become?

And let me say a couple things about the sexuality of this film, since it puts it all up there front and center:

1. I didn't buy for a second Mark Ruffalo fell for Julianne Moore. Let me explain something about the male species - we don't eschew super hot and super cool young chicks who want to bone our brains out in favor of pasty old lesbians with severe confidence issues. Just as a general rule. I suppose I could buy it if I believed they were soul mates or they had "that thing," or chemistry or whatever you want to call it. They didn't. Bad directing. Bad acting.

2. Lovey-dovey-ness. If Annette Bening and Julianne More were a straight couple, their lovey-dovey-ness at the beginning of the film would be deemed disgusting. It was totally indulgent and meek and unrealistic. But because they were lesbians, I am forced to ask myself - am I homophobic? What is wrong with me? Then I realized, I have no problem with lesbians. I'm much more dude-homophobic in that I would much prefer to watch lesbian porn than dude gay porn. Nevertheless, I think Brokeback is an awesome movie and the relationship believable and no way did my weiner move during the gay butt sex scenes. Point is, regardless of whether I am homophobic, this freaking movie hides behind Loving Lesbians to make saccharine, unsexual, and boring "love" scenes between two characters. It hides behind political correctness and forgets we're watching a movie and where the f is the tension in seeing snuggles and kisses?

My last point - don't give characters speeches at the end of movies. Unless you got Al Pacino. And I'm not positive Al can even do it anymore. My body gave out an uncontrolable groan when Julianne Moore stood up and gave her family a speech about marriage. You gotta be kidding me.