My Job, Part II

Today the big issue is whether the project will finish early. We see the boxes dwindling down and all are worried we will finish too quickly and be let go. The lady in love with Johnnie Cochran reveals she asked the Lord last night for the project to last longer.

Meanwhile, the "lead" document reviewer, an African American man in his late 30s has taken it upon himself to organize purchasing a gift for our boss at the end of the week. He's asked everyone to contribute $2 to buy some movie passes and a card (although the math doesn't add up because $2 x 30 = $60, way more than movie passes and a card). I object to this kind of nonsense (we've already celebrated two birthdays in a week - one with cake and ice cream), and buying our boss a present is excessive. But I feel like I'm in some sort of union and begrudgingly give the $2 over to the group. I complain about it and my two table partners say I don't have to give up the money if I don't want to. I say "I know, but then everyone will think I'm cheap." The Mexican chick asks, "Are you cheap?" "Of course," I reply, "but I don't want people to think so."

I decide I will give up the money for the right to complain about giving up the money. I feel like I'm being hustled and taxed, but it's a small price to pay to be able to complain about it, which is infinately more valuable, a good investment, I'd say.

When the "lead" goes to take a break, a women at his table begins to dish the dirt on him from the day. First, he asked her earlier in the day to make a photocopy for him of her document list. She told him to photocopy for himself, to which he replied "I don't know how to work the copier." She told him to go try and if he needs help, she'll help him.

She offers him ice cream later in the day and he asks her to go get him a spoon from the kitchen. "Rrrright...." she says, "Get your own damn spoon." He asks again about the photocopy and she says no again. He says, "I'm the lead."

"Oh, no, he didn't!" Says the lady in love with Johnnie Cochran.

Apparently he doesn't know how to work the machine.

"You a paralegal, all you do is make copies."

"I normally have my secretary do it."

It appears to the group that the position of lead document reviewer has gone to his head, first collecting money from everyone, and then demanding that one of the other document reviewers act as his secretary. Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.

As the day winds down, finally a new batch of documents come in, filling up the back room. The lady in love with Johnnie Cochran raises her arms and whispers to herself, "the lord answers prayers." She turns to me and says, "You know what they call that up in there?"

"Huh?"

"Job security."