Me Gusta Bijou Philips

On LA vs. NY:

I drive this big truck around L.A. So my life's, like, pretty odd compared to most people. Very rural. I live in the Los Feliz area so I drive through Griffith Park to the other side -- you can ride all through Griffith Park, you have 55 miles of trails. It's horse paradise where I live! That's why L.A. is so great! I get to New York in the winter and you can't do anything. It's fine if you don't mind sitting in your apartment doing nothing and you don't mind having dinner and seeing a movie -- it's so boring! There's no activities. In L.A., in an hour you can be in Big Bear skiing. In 45 minutes you can be on the beach in a wetsuit. See? It's better here. You can go on a hike all year round! It smells like sage and magical plants and pepper trees!

Oh, man.

The worst part about New York is you have to live in a little box. In L.A., you can look at a tree and maybe some grass. Maybe you live at the bottom of Runyon and you can leave your place and go for a walk and you can have a dog. And if you already have a dog, it'll be happier! It's just overall better.

I guess!

And you still have all the arts! All the stuff that's in New York is in L.A. All the same bands play. All the art exhibits come. So you can't say, "Oh, it's because of the arts." If you want to go to the theater? There's only so many plays, and they're all on for years, so you can go to New York for a couple weeks. So there's no reason to be in New York. Unless it's friends. And they don't want to be there either. So you can get all your friends to move to L.A. Probably 90% of all your good friends have already moved to L.A. Who would want to come back to a dark box on a loud busy street with construction and debris? Your apartment is so small and filled with coats and jackets and gloves and scarves -- and accessories are cluttering everything and it's miserable. And even if you go out, it's small! Even the massage parlors are small! Everything is small!

Tina Fey just got some competition for my heart.