Tuesday, January 16, 2007

You Want Cynical Realism?

Say the realists are right and Iraq is a disaster... My question: for who?

Some say, most Americans haven't sacrificed anything.

Some say, this has created a whole new generation of jihadists.

Some say it's ruined our reputation around the world.

Some say it's weakened our position in the Middle East.

Some say it's ruined our moral standing.

And on and on...these are the arguments from the realists (now) and the moonbats (who we won't don't even really need to bother with anymore).

So say - as the realists do - that all that matters is American interests and those interests have been damaged. How so?

Our economy is strong. Sadly, we can afford to blow hundreds of billions on failure and still buy cars and houses and send our kids to college. Our armed services are tied down - who cares? Was there something else we were hoping to use them for in the meantime? Is Hitler taking over Europe? Nope. I don't see anything more pressing -- except perhaps Iran, but even that's a stretch.

Most Americans haven't sacrificed anything - good. That shows it hasn't cost us much.

It's caused a new generation of jihadists? Who cares? Just more guys to kill - they've proved how easy that is.

Our reputation is ruined. Who cares? Does it affect our wallet? Does it affect our ability to project power? Nope. Does it affect us getting what we want? I don't see any evidence of it, four years later.

Position in the middle east weakened? Are you kidding? Whose the biggest, badest militia in the region? Not Hezbollah, not Al Queda, not Iran Revolutionary Guards, not the Republican Guard, not even the IDF...sorry folks, we swing the biggest stick and everyone knows it.

Our moral standing. Pfft. This is the realist position, remember?

But what about the Iraqis? Who gives a shit? Seriously...in the realist argument we didn't care about them for the past 27 years...why should we care now. Maybe we don't.

The surge, pullout - what's the difference? It's all change to us...like pondering over whether to tip the guy at the Coffee Bean.

Getting played by Iran? Yeah right. They know as well as we do, if they push us once too many times we blow up their oil facilities and bankrupt their state. Or better yet, fund the Sunni insurgents to get bold and start attacking the Shiia in Iran. Or even better yet - just allow the Saudis to fund the Sunni insurgents. It won't even cost us anything. They get really out of line, we let the Israelis nuke them. Still no skin off our back. The fact is, Iran can't even do anything to us to provoke a direct response. That's how uneven this relationship is. We don't even need to deal with them - we just let others do it for us. Our assistants handle it.

New set of thoughts....

What does the events of post-9/11 mean to the cynical realist? It means we can get hit with an enormous surprise attack - that we can lose Al Queda's "all in" bet and five years later feel little to no long term affect to our country. Shit, we can even make money off it by making movies and mini-series. Al Queda basically provided us with a lot of serious entertainment. They haven't changed our lives a single, remote, tiny bit.

Meanwhile, Al Queda's leadership hides in caves and now considers the ability to release a video on youtube a success. They can do what every 12 year old in America with a Mac is able to do. Congrats. They basically have a lot of time to pray and worry about if anyone is going to betray them.

And not only that...to hammer down the point...we invade a pinnacle country in the heart of the Middle East - not because they had anything to do with 9/11 - but simply because they were in the damn region and looked at us goofy, we went in with one hand and one leg tied behind our backs...without even raising taxes and thumped Saddam and his sons and let the pesky, annoying little militias on all sides spend the rest of the time killing one another while we got suntans in the greenzone or worked on screenplays or bought condos while living in the greatest country on earth.

The lesson - don't fuck with us or we'll turn your country into a civil war zone and play all sides against each other while we read about it on weblogs.

The burden of power. Ha. Pass me a bloody mary. I'm a cynical realist now.

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