Technology

Technology is not neutral. This is my fundamental objection to Facebook and Internet dating. It isn't so much that I am certain they are harmful. Obviously, I cannot say. They may be useful to some people. But I object mostly to the herd acceptance of these technologies and the idea they are not impactful above and beyond their stated utility.

Think about cars. The advent of the car did a whole lot more than simply make it easier to get around. It impacted the way cities were designed, it impacted the air we breathe, it changed geo-politics and the importance of oil. Nearly my entire life is somewhat the way it is because of the advent of the automobile. But none of these things were in the minds of the early adopters of the automobile - and certainly they could not predict or understand the impact of the technology on society.

It is a pointless discussion to think about whether we could turn back the clock on car technology. For the record, I love cars and car culture. Probably one of the main reasons I've never left California. Los Angeles is a city built around the automobile. California is a car state. Most American's have five major rites of passage towards full adulthood.

1. Driving

2. Moving away from home

3. Getting a job/career

4. Getting married

5. Having kids

My point is these things matter. Our technologies reflect our values. Cars represent freedom. They also represent excess. Now think about internet dating and facebook. What do they suggest about our values? The point of internet dating is to find a spouse. It is the stated goal. Some people use the system to get laid, or to avoid loneliness, but I think that is a very small minority. Sure, you aren't marrying every coffee date, but all of it is a form of practice and habit-creation to eventually meet the goal of finding a spouse.

Think about a society of arranged marriages and what it says about their values. It says, family comes before individuals. It says, young folks are not able to make decisions for themselves and that families are wiser. I imagine it also protects the virtues (see virginity) of young women and somewhat implies a lower-status for women, etc.

Now what does it say about a society who meets strangers over the internet to date? Is it society simply harnessing technology to make more efficient the old business of matchmaking? Or is it the popularization of the creepy desperation of love classifieds? Is it reflective of a collective delusion about computers helping us find a digital utopia?

Or does it reflect a massive, system-wide failure of men and women to adopt to changing gender roles? Or are we ushering in a new, better way for male and female relationships to blossom?

I suppose time will tell. I am wary.